No Problem

In the past one could have been forgiven for sheepishly enjoying an Anees Bazmi film like No Entry and even Welcome to some extent on the pretext of being a guilty pleasure but there is nothing, absolutely nothing that can redeem the torture called No Problem.

Centered around a diamond heist where international crook Marcos (Suneil Shetty) and his ragtag bunch of thugs that includes Sophie (Neetu Chandra) has been given the short end of the stick by a minister, No Problem has three or four parallel tracks that can’t be called a story by any stretch of imagination. Yash (Sanjay Dutt) and Raj (Akshaye Khanna) are petty thieves who rob a village bank after taking refuge in Zandulal’s (Paresh Rawal) house. Suspected of being a coconspirator in the robbery Zandulal follows them to Durban in order to clear his name. Meanwhile super idiot cop Arjun Singh (Anil Kapoor) who somehow manages to survive a wife, Kajal (Sushmita Sen), who tries to kill him every time her split personality takes over, ends up capturing Marcos who escapes only to kill the minister when he can’t recover his diamonds. Yash and Raj in order to return Zandulal’s money end up robbing the dead minister’s safe along with the diamonds so that Zandulal keeps his mouth shut about Raj’s real identity lest his marriage to Sanjana (Kangana Ranaut), who happens to be Kajal’s younger sister is stopped by her Police Commissioner father, Shakti Kapoor. This confusing nonsense is just half the story! To makes worse everyone ends up following everyone else, everyone tries to double-cross everyone else and everyone heaves a sigh of relief when a bunch of gorillas set things right.

Designed to antagonize the daylights out of the viewer, No Problem is loud, crass and lacks everything that constitutes a film right from the word go. There are a few lines that might look funny, a few sequences that might force you to throw in a chuckle or two but everything else is a big problem. The acting is miserable with producer Anil Kapoor leading the charge; Paresh Rawal, Askhaye Khanna, Sanjay Dutt, Sushmita Sen and Suniel Shetty all try to outdo each other but special mention needs to be made of Kangana Ranaut, who singularly packs in the one of the worst acting jobs you’d ever see.

There is nothing wrong with humor that, at times, is forced down one’s throat but to orchestrate an whole film around mindless premise where an entire South African village happens to speak Hindi, where just about everyone from Durban’s police commissioner to South Africa’s Mining Minister is an Indian and gorillas act like humans and humans prance around like a bunch of drunk monkeys is just not funny.

A miserable excuse of a film No Problem is best avoided. Anees Bazmi, who in the past has been credited with writing films such as Aankhen, Shola Aur Shabnam and Deewana Mastana, unapologetically makes a complete hash of No Problem. Avoid.

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